OPINION: The day a gaggle of social activists striving to prevent offence to a particular minority inadvertently causes offence to an even smaller minority is finally upon us.
That minute minority is the Gays.
No, not The Gays.
Just the Gays… the women (and maybe men, I mustn't exclude the possibility) whose parents wrote Gay on their birth certificate. Or Gaynell or Gaynore or Gaylene or Gaylord.
Let me explain.
A woman named Gay Fairweather complained to the Advertising Standards Authority about an ad calling out Kiwis on their homophobic use of the word 'gay'.
The ad implies all females named Gay are not themselves unless they are lesbian, in the self-centred world according to Gay Fairweather.
What the actual f**k?
If there's one thing that grinds my gears more than ACTUAL discrimination, racism, homophobia or xenophobia; it's the boy who cried wolf about any of the above.
Gay, you cannot be offended by this because your name happens to be a double entendre.
Just as Dick or Pussy. Or maybe ask Mr Ramsbottom and Mrs Smellie.
Feeling offended by people using your name to reference its alternative meaning is way over the top.
Don't take shit so personally.
It's not about you, Gay.
The world doesn't revolve around, you.
Nobody is offended by this but you and nobody thinks less of you because of this ad.
Just go on with your life and accept that, from time to time, your name will cause you some annoyance.
If life as Gay is too hard for you, you could always change your name?
I've always loved Les for a girl. You know, short for Lesley.
(NB: If it turns out Gay Fairweather is actually some savvy prankster then touché, Ms Fairweather, touché.)
Ryan Bridge is the host of Your Sunday on RadioLIVE.