Warning: This article discusses sexual assault, drug use, eating disorders and self-harm, and may be distressing for some readers - helplines are located at the bottom of the article.
Demi Lovato has candidly revealed more the near-fatal 2018 overdose that saw her hospitalised for weeks, saying she was sexually assaulted by her drug dealer and "left for dead" at the time.
The singer said that incident mirrored one that took place when she was 15 years old, where she "lost her virginity in a rape" by someone she knew.
Lovato made the shocking revelations in the first episode of her new docuseries Dancing With The Devil, which premiered at SXSW and is due to be released on YouTube next week.
"What people don't realise about that night for me is that I didn't just overdose, I also was taken advantage of," she said in the series, according to US media outlets.
"When they found me, I was naked. I was blue. I was literally left for dead after he took advantage of me."
Lovato said when she woke up in the hospital, she was asked if she had participated in consensual sex.
"There was one flash that I had of him on top of me. I saw that flash and said, 'Yes'. It wasn't until a month after the overdose that I realised, 'You weren't in any state of mind to make a consensual decision'."
The 'Cool for the Summer' hitmaker also recalled being sexually assaulted as a teenager in footage intercut with red carpet interviews from her Disney days starring in Camp Rock and Camp Rock 2.
"I really beat myself up for years, which is also why I had a really hard time coming to terms with the fact that it was a rape when it happened," she said
"We were hooking up but I said, 'Hey, this is not going any further. I'm a virgin and I don't want to lose it this way.'
"And that didn't matter to them, they did it anyway," she went on. "And I internalised it, and I told myself it was my fault because I still went in the room with him. I still hooked up with him."
Lovato did not name her offender, but said she that she "still had to see them all the time" and they were "not taken off the movie they were working on".
"I stopped eating, and, you know, coped in other ways - cutting, throwing up, whatever," she said.
"My bulimia got so bad that I started throwing up blood for the first time."
The now 28-year-old said she was coming forward about what happened to her in the hopes of inspiring others to speak up, "if they can and feel comfortable doing so".
"Women are typically more repressed than men, especially at 15 years old, and especially as a little child star role model who’s supposed to be perfect, who had a promise ring!" she said.
Elsewhere in the first episode of Dancing With The Devil, Lovato revealed she was surprised she didn't overdose the first night of her relapse, which came after six years of sobriety.
"I just went to town. I went on a shopping spree. That night I did drugs I'd never done before," she said.
"I'd never done meth before, I tried meth. I mixed it with [ecstasy], with coke, weed, alcohol, oxycontin," she continued.
"And that alone should have killed me."
In the trailer for the documentary, Lovato tells viewers she had suffered three strokes and a heart attack due to her overdose, which was suspected to be from heroin.
"My doctors said that I had five to 10 more minutes," she said.
Where to find help and support:
- Shine (domestic violence) - 0508 744 633
- Women's Refuge - 0800 733 843 (0800 REFUGE)
- Need to Talk? - Call or text 1737
- What's Up - 0800 WHATS UP (0800 942 8787)
- Lifeline - 0800 543 354 or (09) 5222 999 within Auckland
- Youthline - 0800 376 633, text 234, email talk@youthline.co.nz or online chat
- Samaritans - 0800 726 666
- Depression Helpline - 0800 111 757
- Suicide Crisis Helpline - 0508 828 865 (0508 TAUTOKO)
- Shakti Community Council - 0800 742 584
