The parents of murdered Feilding farmer Scott Guy say they are determined to move forward with their lives and set a good example for their grandchildren, despite the tragedy that tore their lives apart 10 years ago.
In July 2010, Jo and Bryan Guy's 31-year-old son Scott was shot dead at the gate of the family farm. Six months later his brother-in-law Ewen Macdonald was charged with his murder but found not guilty following a highly public trial.
Jo told The Ryan Bridge Drive Show on Magic Talk she remembers parts of the night her son was killed - but others are still fuzzy, even after all this time.
"When I came home all the lights were on and the curtains were pulled but no one was home and I thought 'that's odd'," she said on Monday.
"Bryan rang me about 20 minutes later and said 'can you come out to the farm, something's happened to Scott'."
"I couldn't imagine what it could be."
Jo remembers the raw emotion she felt when Bryan told her Scott was dead and it seemed someone had murdered him.
"I dropped to the floor and I just felt like my heart had been ripped out," she said.
But Bryan says despite the heartache, they're trying to live their lives as best they can.
"You can't say 'what if' and 'if only'," he told Bridge.
"You have to look forward, especially for the grandkids - they look to us so you want to think about building resilience in their lives so they can cope with what life throws at them in the future."
They don't dwell on the unsolved murder either, instead focusing on bettering the lives of those around them.
"We don't go there [about questioning whether police and the courts did enough to solve the case] - because it's all about looking forward. We're never going to know [who killed Scott]," said Bryan.
"It's a matter of survival that we don't go there."
As for survival, Jo credits theirs to the community they're surrounded by.
"One of the biggest things has been the love and support of people in the community and the amazing people we have met through it which we wouldn't have met otherwise," she said.
"If it wasn't for that I really think we wouldn't have survived."
Although they don't dwell on his death, the memory of Scott is alive and well in the Guy household. Jo and Bryan both say they think of their son daily and he often comes up in conversation.
"He's just a natural part of conversation so it seems like he's still a part of the family," Jo said.
Police say anyone with information about the murder should call the non-emergency line on 105.
