When Auckland tetraplegic Dean Brennan finally drifts off to sleep, his devoted wife tip-toes into the lounge-turned-bedroom to check he is still breathing.
It is an exhausting night time ritual, but love and fear are a powerful force in life.
Brennan has been a tetraplegic since an accident in 1997 and depends on round-the-clock care from his wife and others, who do everything he cannot.
After years of uninterrupted home help funded by the Accident Compensation Corporation, the sudden loss of almost 14 hours of care per week in February shocked and baffled the Brennans.
Without his wife's help, Dean Brennan feared he would end up desperately ill in hospital, or worse.
"I'd get really sick, really quick in those hours," he said.
"It's hospital time, definitely. Without a doubt, I'd end up calling the ambulance."
Brennan sought a review of the decision which was to be heard in August, but following queries from RNZ this week ACC has reversed the decision, reinstated his attendant care and home help hours and apologised.
ACC acting chief operating officer Gabrielle O'Connor said the reduction in hours was based on the availability of support from his wife.
"As Dean's claim was made under previous legislation that does not include reliance on family support, we have reversed the decision," she said.
"We've let Dean know his previous attendant care and home help hours will be reinstated and we'll continue to work closely with him to ensure he's receiving the help and support he needs. We are committed to supporting Dean and have apologised for any distress or frustration this has caused."
The about-face means Brennan, 61, no longer has to spend thousands of dollars on lawyer's fees fighting his case, which has caused he and his wife enormous stress.
"Thank God the stress is all gone, the fact that I don't have to find any money to find a lawyer to deal with all this legal jargon. It's just fantastic, it's a real weight lifted," he said.
For almost four months his wife Eleanor has been working for free to cover the hours, along with caring for Dean's 79-year-old father who also lives at their Henderson home.
"I'm being a slave, it's so tiring. I'm not Superwoman," she said.
"Why did they have to cut them? Why, because of me as a wife, I'm always here? That's so unfair."
Brennan occasionally falls asleep on her feet, yet still found the energy to dance around the kitchen when the ACC case manager rang to apologise.
"I was so happy, I don't know how to describe it, it was like I was on fire. I was shaking like someone who had won the lottery," she said.
While he is grateful for the decision in his favour, Brennan said it was ridiculous he had to resort to media attention for the ACC fix its mistake.
"I've always praised ACC and the way they've supported me. It's scary, this could be happening elsewhere," he said.
Spinal Support NZ's northern regional manager Georgia Cameron said she was appalled by Brennan's treatment.
"It shouldn't have to come to getting media attention for the hours to be reinstated. Dean needs those hours and for him to go to these lengths to get these hours reinstated I think is appalling," she said.
"It's not because he wants them, it's because he needs them."
Brennan was previously entitled to 178.35 care hours per week, which dropped to 164.5 per week following a support needs assessment by the ACC.
The Brennans believed the hours were slashed in return for the ACC providing a turning bed, all-terrain wheelchair, water dispenser and voice-activated device.
ACC said the decision was not dependent on the supply of equipment, but Georgia Cameron questioned why the message had changed.
"To me it's just covering, they're just trying to cover the mistake," she said.
"He's not the only person this has happened to. Every day people are having to fight for themselves. They're already going through a traumatic time, let alone having to fight ACC for support that they need."
Brennan's bed arrived last week, but was too big for his home and had to be returned.
He is yet to receive the chair, but ACC said a trial was underway and an occupational therapist would advise if it was a suitable option.
No-one has yet shown the Brennans how to attach the special hands-free water bottle to his existing chair.
Equipment is one thing, but Brennan still needs someone to tuck pillows, press buttons and bring drinks to his lips.
"My fingers do not work, I wish they did," he said.
"I'd dearly love to do it myself, but I can't."
He is forever thankful for the love and unstinting care of his wife - the Brennans know their lives depend on it.
"Probably, he'd be dead without me, or probably stuck in a hospital most of the time," Eleanor said.
"I'd be lost without him, he'd be lost without me. What can you do when you love someone? You just have to be there, 24/7."
Spinal Support NZ: (09) 270 3526
RNZ
