The off-duty Kiwi soldier killed while fighting in Ukraine was Corporal Dominic Abelen, who had served in the NZ Army for 10 years, but never got to fight for his country.
But he was away on leave without pay at the time of his death. His leave request did not specify that he would travel to Ukraine and he didn't tell his family he was going.
The NZDF says no personnel have been approved to enter the country, but an NZDF team was sent to the UK last year in support of Ukraine. Abelen was not part of that contingent.
His father, Bryce Abelen, on Thursday said his son had "sacrificed his life for others to have a life".
He didn't know his son was joining the war.
"He didn't tell us he was going to Ukraine until he was there," said Bryce. "He knew we would talk him out of it. He also knew the risks of going there but still went to fight for them. That is Dominic, always thinking of helping others."
The soldier also didn't tell the army. He was there on leave without pay.
"I also want to stress too that at no point in time since the conflict began that any of our personnel have been authorised to enter into Ukraine," said Defence Minister Peeni Henare.
Abelen had been in Ukraine for three months and last week spoke to TodayFM's Tova O'Brien - using the name Tolkien while fighting on the Eastern front.
"I'm here in Ukraine helping Ukraine maintain its independence and push back Russia," he said.
"It's good to put our skills to the test and the NZDF training is serving us well I think."
Former Defence Minister and soldier Ron Mark told Newshub: "This is what they're trained to do, they're good, decent people."
Mark also felt that weight of duty and went to Ukraine in May.
"They see on one hand atrocities being committed, innocent civilians being slaughtered and on the other hand a skillset that they have and an ability to do something, yet their Government clearly doesn't want to do it."
Aaron Woods is a former rifleman and has been working with about 100 current or former soldiers in Ukraine.
"I've had contact with another Kiwi who was there with him at the time and is reported to have taken a round to his chest plate, to his body armour fighting alongside Dominic. I know there is reports of another foreign fighter in the team who was killed alongside them."
Henare said "the situation is a complicated one".
"The job now is to find out more details."
With details scarce, Defence Force and Foreign Affairs officials are working together.
"We will be doing everything that New Zealanders would expect us to do, as does the family, work with the Ukrainian government to bring this citizen home," said Foreign Affairs Minister Nanaia Mahuta.
A citizen, a son, a brother, whose family has a harrowing wait for him to come home.
