Returning Kiwis halfback Benji Marshall says he has no shame about bursting into tears during the New Zealand national anthem before their rugby league tests against Mate Ma'a Tonga on Saturday night.
Marshall's seven-year exile from international rugby league ended when he ran out at Mount Smart Stadium, playing a key role in helping the Kiwis avenge the disappointing World Cup defeat of 2017 with a 34-14 win.
- Opinion: Kiwis v Tonga - How the players rated in New Zealand's win over Mate Ma'a
- Shaun Johnson pleased to restore pride in New Zealand jersey
- Shaun Johnson double propels New Zealand to victory
But the talking point for Marshall was the emotion he displayed during 'God Defend New Zealand'.
With his son in the stands, watching him represent New Zealand, and remembering his recently deceased grandfather, Marshall was overcome with emotion.
"When the anthem came on I lost it there a bit," he told media on Sunday.
"Regarding those emotions, it was just everything put together. I knew I missed the jersey, but I didn't know how much it really meant to me until this week and that sort of moment and it just hit me."
His grandfather died last year, which added to the occasion.
"I didn't think about it during the week, but at the time I just realised... he never got to see me wear the jersey for another time," he said.
"My wife and my son were there - they came last minute. Having my son be able to reflect on some of those photos of after the game, being on the field and knowing that his dad played for the Kiwis and he got to see it, is something I'm going to treasure for life."
He added it was "special" having his wife and son watching and cheering him on.
"My wife took some videos of him watching the haka on the big screen, and he was doing his pukanas, and she said he had the best time ever. For me, that is a big part of why I play now.
"[Having them there] added to the occasion and most importantly we got the result we wanted."
The 2008 World Cup winner added his teammates were fully supportive of him, as they stopped singing the anthem when they realised he was emotional and reminded him "we got you, koro".
Marshall said he had received lots of messages during the week from all over the rugby league community who were pleased to see him back in the black jersey.
"I've been overwhelmed by the support, not only by Kiwi fans but people over in Australia and even the Tongan fans. The way the crowd turned up and embraced international league is great for the test arena, and I'd compare it to an NRL Grand Final."
Even some of his teammates were former fans.
"The weird thing for me is that lots of the young guys playing in the squad now all say 'I looked up to you when I was a kid'. To me that means a lot, it means I'm playing with guys who I've inspired."
The West Tigers pivot hopes he'll play for the Kiwis at the end of the year when they face Australia and Great Britain in October and November.
"I go back to club level now and my goal is to help get our team into the semi-finals, so that's the priority," he said.
"But you've got to take it one week at a time and as much as I've loved this week, I want to get picked again at the end of the year on the back of deserving it."
Newshub.
